WEEK SEVEN ~ EXEUNT, ...

Another one I want to flush out more...

EXEUNT, ...

By

Kyle Gregory Boynton

Cast of Characters
Derek:
Chris:
Mona:
Tina:
Comedy:
Tragedy:

Scene
a Stage.

Time
Now.

Lights up on DEREK. He sits center stage. Reads.

DEREK
All the world’s a stage, And all the men and women
merely players; They have their exits and entrances,
And one man in his time plays many parts.

DEREK stands.

DEREK
Infant, whining school boy, lover, soldier, justice,
Pantaloon...

Pause

DEREK
Last scene of all... ends his strange eventful
history... mere oblivion.

MONA enters.

MONA
Is all our company here?

TINA enters

TINA
Our season opener is going to be Shakespeare’s cursed
play.

MONA
And, because of this, we’re going to be fairly delicate
with the title.

TINA
So, during auditions, rehearsals, performances--

MONA
--And for marketing purposes--

DEREK
(aside)
Words, words, words.

TINA
We’re calling this particular production.. The Scottish
Play.

MONA and TINA exit.

DEREK lights a cigarette.

CHRIS enters

CHRIS
Can I bum one?

DEREK hands a cigarette to CHRIS

CHRIS
How do you think auditions went?

DEREK
Waste of time.

CHRIS
How so?

DEREK
I just played Hamlet...

CHRIS
Ah..

DEREK
What’s the point of auditioning? They know what I can
do.

CHRIS
You’ll make a great Mac, too.

DEREK
Yeah.

MONA enters with two folders/scripts. She hands
one to each DEREK and CHRIS.

Hugs CHRIS.

MONA
Congrats, Chris! You’re going to be a great Mac.

CHRIS
Thanks! I’m still completely shocked.

Pause.

CHRIS
I’ll see you inside.

CHRIS exits.

MONA
Congrats -

DEREK
Save it.

MONA
You’re replaceable, you know? Do you want the part or
not? I don’t need you moping around.

DEREK
I’ll be fine.

MONA
I don’t want to hear it! Just, do your job. You should
be happy for Chris, this is going to be his first lead
role with us. You’ve had plenty.

MONA exits.

DEREK begins to exit. Stops. He sees "something"
in the audience. He moves slowly to center, gazing
outward.
Pause.
On either side (right/left) of the stage, COMEDY
and TRAGEDY enter. (Both wear all black. Each have
a white mask - Comedy mask for COMEDY and a
Tragedy mask for, you guessed it, TRAGEDY) They
move in unison, with the sound of a HEARTBEAT
offstage.
DEREK slowly becomes aware of them, as they begin
to circle him. DEREK quickly moves to one side of
the stage, they STOP. He raises his right arm,
they copy. DEREK lowers his arm, they copy. DEREK
doesn’t move.
They start circling again, now moving closer.
Faster. The HEARTBEAT goes faster and faster. They
reach DEREK. COMEDY holds out a slapstick, TRAGEDY
holds out a dagger.
LIGHTS OUT!
Pause
Lights up. COMEDY and TRAGEDY are gone. DEREK is
alone on stage, holding a dagger.
Lights out.
CHRIS screams.
Lights slowly rise on DEREK standing over CHRIS’
body.

DEREK
Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player that struts
and frets his hour upon the stage, And then is heard no
more. It is a tale Told by an idiot, full of sound and
fury, signifying nothing.

CURTAIN

WEEK SIX ~ GUARDIAN DEVIL

GUARDIAN DEVIL

By

Kyle Gregory Boynton

2010

Lights up on a "hospital room". Bed center stage,
chair next to it. Otherwise, bare.
SAM lays in bed, eyes shut. He is restrained.

Lights flicker.

MILES enters through the door. Secures door. He
walks over and checks SAM’s restraints. Sits in
chair. MILES takes out a book and begins reading.

SAM
What are you reading?

MILES ignores.

SAM
I bet if I attack you again, you’ll talk to me. Worked
last time.

MILES turns a page.

SAM
Protocol.

MILES
Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.

SAM
Book report?

MILES
One of my favorites.

Lights flicker

SAM
Power gonna go out.

MILES
Generator.

SAM
Generator gonna go out.

MILES
..Maybe.

Pause.

SAM
Why are you here?

MILES
Because you’ve been labeled danger to yourself or
others. If the power does go out, you’ll be trapped
here. They want me to be in here if that happens, so
nothing happens to you.

Pause.

SAM
Why are you here?

MILES
Sam, I just got done telling you--

SAM
(interrupting)
Not that! This job. This town. Why?

MILES
A jobs, a job.

SAM
Why this job?

MILES
Because... I need a job.

SAM
But why this job?

MILES
Eventually I want to be a police officer.

SAM
I see.

MILES
You got any other questions, or can I go back to
reading?

SAM
If you’ve read that before, what’s the point? You know
the ending.

MILES
Probably the same reason you do drugs. You know the
ending to that. You get arrested and put in here until
you sober up. Then you go to jail.

SAM
Escapism?

MILES
I suppose.

SAM
You read to escape your mundane existence, and I do the
same. But with the drugs.
(pause)
Did you kiss your daughter before you left?

MILES
How did you know I had a daughter?

SAM
I bet she misses you.. Too bad you’ll never get to see
you again.. After tonight..

MILES
(spooked)
I’m gonna go back to my book.

SAM
Don’t you wanna know--

MILES
(interrupting)
SHUT UP! Just lay there, okay? I’m not here to talk to
you. Just shut up.

Lights flicker

Pause

SAM
The power will go out soon. The woman in the room
across the hall will lose her mind, start screaming.
The elderly man that was just taken out of the room
next to us is going to get stuck in the elevator...

MILES
Okay...

SAM
And we’re going to be trapped in here. You’d better
prop the door open - it being an electronic lock and
all..
(pause)
And since we’re going to be in here a while, you might
as well talk to me. Why don’t you ask me the questions?
Or, you can ask God. You see. I can talk to God.

MILES
Sure.. Tell God I say what’s up.

SAM
(muttering to himself)
He says I’m right.

MILES
What?

Lights out. An eerie, red, dimly lights the stage.

SAM
About the power.

A WOMAN screaming is heard. MILES rushes to the
door, tries to open. Fails.

WOMAN (VOICE)
What happened to the lights!?!

MILES
Shit.
(to his radio)
Need assistance in the west hall. Room 144. Trapped
with patient. Woman across the hall needs to be
secured.

Static.

WOMAN (VOICE)
HELP!! OH MY GOD!!

SAM laughs, quietly.

MILES
(to his radio)
Can anyone hear me?

WOMAN (VOICE)
IT’S HIM!! HE’S TAKING ME!!!!

MILES
(to his radio)
Hello?

Static. Nothing. Miles bangs on the door.

MILES
Let me out!

SAM’s laugh grows.

The WOMAN screams. Blackout.
**The following dialogue takes place in the
blackout.

SAM
Where are the other guards?

MILES
She’s dead..
(pause)
How’d you know...

SAM
The weather is pretty awful tonight.

MILES
HOW DID YOU KNOW!?

SAM convulses, screaming.

A struggle between MILES and SAM is heard. MILES
screams.

Pause.

MILES lights a "match". The stage is illuminated
enough to see MILES laying on the ground. His
shirt is ripped. A large "cut" is seen. SAM stands
on the bed.
"Match" goes out.
Breathing.
The eerie red light from before slowly rises to
the end.

MILES
What are you?
(pause)
I thought he-- I thought you weren’t real..

SAM
If you could know the answer to any question, what
would you want to know?

Pause.

MILES
Is she proud of me? Even though I gave up my dream for
her?

SAM
Yes.

MILES
I don’t get to see her again, do I?

SAM
Afraid not. Your time is up.

MILES
What are you?

SAM
Your guardian devil.

CURTAIN

WEEK FIVE ~ FOR YOU

FOR YOU

By

Kyle Gregory Boynton

Lights up on a "forest". A "log" is stage...
whatever.

ADAM enters carrying a bottle of wine.
He sits on the "log", sullenly.
He takes the cork out of the bottle, takes a swig.

NOAH enters.

NOAH
Why’d you run off?

ADAM
Why do you think?

NOAH
You have to make a decision!

ADAM
No, not this.

NOAH
You’re the president of the united states!

ADAM
Get out!

NOAH
No.

ADAM
Leave. Now!

NOAH
Pathetic.

NOAH exits.

ADAM rises. Anger flourishes. Throws bottle.

AMY enters.

ADAM
Not you too.

AMY
Why?

ADAM
I can’t handle something like this...

AMY
Yes, you can.

ADAM
Not after-

AMY
I believe.

ADAM
What is there to believe in anymore?

AMY
Me?

ADAM
You’re not real anymore.

AMY
You’re talking to me, aren’t you?

ADAM
Pressure..

AMY
Anxiety...

ADAM
How can I make this decision.

AMY
You have to.

ADAM
Why?

AMY
For me.

ADAM pulls out his cell phone, dials a number.

ADAM
For you.

ADAM presses a button.

END OF PLAY

WEEK FOUR ~ SO?

SO?
By
Kyle Gregory Boynton

INT. FRED’S CAR - DUSK
FRED - confident, charming - sits in the driver’s seat,
eagerly.
He reaches into the backseat, pulls out a BOX. Sets it on
the dashboard.
Suddenly, FRED perks up at the sight of RUTH entering the
car.

FRED
So?

She plops down in her seat, unsatisfied.

RUTH
No.

FRED
(confused)
No?

She sighs.

RUTH
No.

RUTH notices the box. Inspects it, curiously. FRED nods.
Picks it up and hands it to her.
She opens the box to find a calendar that features FRED in
erotic poses for each month - firefighter, astronaut, etc.
RUTH laughs. Hard. Cries a little. Her makeup starts to run
from her eyes, making her look like a rock star with heavy
eyeliner.
She looks in the mirror, wiping her eyes, notices her
appearance.

RUTH
It’s all your fault!

Playfully hits FRED.

FRED
(laughing)
I couldn’t help it!

Beat.

RUTH
(seductively)
So?

FRED
So!

They embrace, passionately.

CUT TO BLACK:
END OF FILM

WEEK THREE ~ A DRINK ON THE ROOF

**Already planning on expanding this one. It's based on the Lakewood police shootings that happened a year ago.

A DRINK ON THE ROOF

By

Kyle Gregory Boynton

Cast of Characters
Will
Dean

Scene
A roof

Time
Evening


Lights up on a "roof". WILL stands near the
railing holding a beer. He is dressed in his
street attire, a badge can be seen along his belt.
On the railing lays a vase, next to that, rests a
beer.
After a moment, DEAN enters - wearing a police
uniform.

DEAN
Here you are..

WILL
What do you want?

DEAN
Captain sent me up to check on you.
(pause)
How are you doing?

WILL
What do you think?

WILL shifts away from DEAN. DEAN moves closer
notices the vase and beer.

DEAN
You used to come up here together?
(pause)
Musta been a nice way to end a shift.
(another pause)
Nice view--

WILL
(interrupting)
If you can’t tell, I want to be alone, please.

DEAN
I just thought you could use the company is all..

WILL
Then you clearly don’t understand.

WILL finishes his beer. Grabs another.

DEAN
The Captain wanted me to--

WILL
(interrupting)
Fine. If the Captain ordered you to come up here. Stay.
Just stand there.
(long pause)
Have they tracked him down yet?

DEAN
No.

WILL
What do they know?

DEAN
They’re building their case. Interviewing his family.
Sounds like he’d been talking about doing something
like this for some time.

WILL
It’s been a week. How haven’t they found him yet?

DEAN
Captain thinks the family has been hiding him, fixing
up his wounds so he doesn’t have to go to the
hospital..

WILL
Cause they know when we find him, we aren’t going to
arrest him. We’re going to kill him dead.

DEAN
I don’t know about that.. The law--

WILL
(interrupting)
Fuck what the law says. You’re a rookie. I get that.
Haven’t had the chance to make friends with anyone yet.
So you don’t get it. You kill a cop, you have a 10%
chance of survival. You kill four, you might as well be
a ghost.

DEAN
I understand that.. But, I also understand that there
is protocol for this stuff. And I understand--

WILL
--Forget it.

DEAN
I UNDERSTAND, that you’re upset.

WILL
Do you?

DEAN
Yes.

WILL
You understand, that less than a week ago, four
officers - one of whom was like a brother to me - was
shot in a coffee house, off-duty, in cold blood. Some
nut job just came in, pulled out a gun and ended their
lives. You understand that he’s still out there,
waiting for god knows what kind of another opportunity,
AND you can still stand there and tell me we should
follow "protocol"?
(pause)
Let me ask you, why’d you even become a cop?

DEAN
My father. He was an officer, who died on duty. I was
15. I can remember, the police chief visiting our house
to break the news.. My Dad’s partner got shot during
some scuffle at a raid or something. My Dad, without
really thinking it through, went after the guy for
shooting his partner. Chased him to an ally downtown.
And got himself killed. If he had stayed, secured the
area where his partner was, he would have lived to see
me follow in his footsteps.
(pause)
Just because you think it’d be easy to chase this guy
down and make him pay, doesn’t mean that it will be.
And killing him wont make the pain any easier to deal
with.

WILL
What happened to him, the guy who killed your father?

DEAN
Life in prison. But, I think he ended up getting killed
in there.
(pause)
Well, I guess I’ll leave you to the sky line.

DEAN begins to exit.

WILL
Wait.

DEAN stops, turns back.

WILL
Here.

WILL hands the beer that was next to the vase to
DEAN.

WILL
Tell me more about your father.

DEAN takes a sip of beer.

DEAN
Only if you tell me more about him.

DEAN indicates the vase.


END OF PLAY

WEEK TWO ~ TALKING DISCO BALL

**I promise next week will be better.

TALKING DISCO BALL

By

Kyle Gregory Boynton

FADE IN:
EXT. PARK - DAY
CHARLES - nervous, lanky - sits on a park bench. Next to him rests a DISCO BALL.

Charles is distressed. He nervously looks at his watch.

In the distance, police sirens can be heard.

CUT TO:
EXT. PARK - ANOTHER PART
PETER runs!

CUT TO:
EXT. PARK - DAY
Charles perks as PETER - high strung, confident - reaches the bench.

CHARLES
(rising)
Finally! Where have you been?

CUT TO:
EXT. ALLEYWAY - DAY (FLASHBACK)

PETER runs frantically, tipping over trash cans and various items, as if to make obstacles for someone chasing him.

PETER (V.O)
Where have I been?

CUT TO:
EXT. PARK - CONTINUOUS (PRESENT)
Back to scene.
Peter catches his breath.

PETER
Where have I been?! Did you not hear the sirens?

Charles becomes more tense.

CHARLES
Cops?

PETER
No! It was a bunch of ambulances chasing me!

CHARLES
Okay, relax. I’m new at this whole thief situation.

PETER
It’s fine. The important thing is that you’ve got the money--

Peter notices the DISCO BALL.

PETER (CONT’D)
--Why do you have a Disco Ball?

CHARLES
I don’t know. It’s what Frank handed me out the window. I figured the money was in it.

PETER
Did you check?

They both stare at the Disco Ball.

Peter examines it, nothing.

PETER
Great.

CHARLES
Where is Frank? Maybe he has the rest of--

PETER
We can’t wait for him. We have to leave. Now!

CHARLES
What happened to him, Peter?

CUT TO:
EXT. DEADEND ALLEY (FLASHBACK)
FRANK runs towards a wall carrying a bag. He reaches the wall, looks for an exit, nothing. He drops the bag. Turns to face the camera. Pulls out two machine water guns. He gets "shot", a bunch.

FRANK
(screaming)
You’ll never get me alive pigs!!

CUT TO:
EXT. PARK - CONTINUOUS (PRESENT)

CHARLES
Why did he bring guns?

PETER
Yeah... He usually just does.

CHARLES
So, he’s dead.

PETER
Didn’t you listen?

CHARLES
What about your grab?

CUT TO:
EXT. ANOTHER ALLEYWAY (FLASHBACK)
PETER is still running. Carries a bag. He reaches a dumpster, hides behind it.

PETER
Damn it!

Peter looks at his bag.

CUT TO:
EXT. OPEN DUMPSTER (FLASHBACK)
An open dumpster - Peter throws his bag. Shuts lid.

CUT TO:
EXT. ANOTHER ALLEYWAY (FLASHBACK)
Peter begins running again.

CHARLES (V.O)
You left it?

CUT TO:
EXT. PARK - CONTINUOUS (PRESENT)

PETER
At least I stole something worth stealing.

CHARLES
I was the runner! It was Frank who was suppose to grab the most valuable thing in sight and throw it to me out the window.

PETER
Whatever! What are we suppose to do now?

Charles sighs. He looks at the Disco Ball.

CHARLES
It’s gotta mean something...

PETER
It’s a fucking Disco Ball!!

FRANK - confused, out of it - runs up to them.

PETER
What the?

FRANK
There you guys are!

CHARLES
We thought you died!

Frank stumbles over, catching his breath.

FRANK
Me? No.

Frank is also extremely drenched.

CHARLES
Are you hurt? Did they shoot you?

FRANK
Hurt? No. Shot? Yes. As you can see.

By now, Frank has established himself as "pothead".

PETER
Jesus..

CHARLES
I thought you said he got shot, Peter!?

PETER
I.. Thought he did.

FRANK
(chuckles)
I did. Some damn kids got me. Charles grabs Frank by the shirt.

CHARLES
Frank! You gotta listen carefully..

FRANK
Ouch, man. You’re hurting my shirt..

CHARLES
Why’d you give me the disco ball.

Suddenly, Frank becomes really REALLY angry.

FRANK
(deadpan)
Where is that fucking thing?

PETER
On the bench...?

Frank shoves Charles off of him, grabs the disco ball, and smashes it on the ground.

CHARLES
What the hell, Frank?

FRANK
This piece of shit, man. This guy’s been talking shit!

Peter and Charles exchange looks of confusion.

CUT TO:
INT. APARTMENT (FLASHBACK)
FRANK crawls through a window. He looks around.
PETER follows.

PETER
(calling out window)
Wait here. We’ll grab the loot.

Peter goes into the next room. Frank stays. He is distracted by a Disco Ball on the desk.

CUT TO:
FRANK POV - DISCO BALL FACE

An evil face appears on the Disco Ball.

DISCO BALL
You’re a pathetic bunch! You’re gonna get caught! I’m calling the cops!!

CUT TO:
INT. APARTMENT
Frank begins yelling.

FRANK
THE COPS!!! RUN!!

CUT TO:
EXT. APARTMENT ALLY
Charles hears Frank yelling, panics.

CHARLES
Hurry up! I can hear them coming!

*He really can’t.
Frank pokes his head out the window. Drops the Disco Ball.

FRANK
Every man for himself!!

Charles, confused, takes off running.

CUT TO:
EXT. PARK - CONTINUOUS (PRESENT)
Peter and Charles sit on the bench. Peter, pissed. Charles, confused.
Frank stands, oblivious.

CHARLES
The cops weren’t after us were they?

FRANK
The cops!? I’m more worried that Disco Balls can talk...

Beat.

PETER
Fuckin’ idiot.

END OF FILM

WEEK ONE ~ "FEEDING" THE SEAGULLS

"FEEDING" THE SEAGULS
By
Kyle Gregory Boynton

Cast of Characters
JERRY: the Journalist
TANYA: the Woman

Scene
A "beach"

Time
Present? The future? Yeah, the future is cooler sounding.

Lights up on a "beach". JERRY enters carrying a
potato gun. Positions himself center(ish) stage,
takes aim, and fires at a "Seagull" above the
audience. *Each time a "Seagull" is hit,
"squaking" sounds can be heard over JERRY’s
twisted laughter.

JERRY
Sons-of-bitches!

~~He shoots one more. Laughs.
~~TANYA enters.

TANYA
What the fuck are you doing?

JERRY
What does it look like?

TANYA
It looks like you’re shooting seagulls!

JERRY
Bingo!

TANYA
I’m pretty sure this is illegal!

JERRY
They’re baby potatoes! It’s not going to kill them. In
fact, I’m saying I’m feeding them. This is my "feeding
birds time" so leave me the hell alone.

TANYA
This would be a lot funnier if you were like in your
80’s. It honestly looks like you’ve lost your mind.

JERRY
Well, in a way, I suppose that’s true.

TANYA
How so?

~~JERRY shoots another "Seagull".

TANYA
Stop that!

JERRY
No! It’s helping me!

TANYA
It’s helping you with what?

JERRY
I’m not going to say my life with a complete stranger!

TANYA
But you’ll shoot at seagulls?

JERRY
...Fine. It’s helping me with my writer’s block.

TANYA
So... You. Shoot birds when you have writer’s block?

JERRY
Just.. Seagulls.

TANYA
Oh.

JERRY
Yeah.

TANYA
Why seagulls?

JERRY
(sighs)
Because they’re seagulls. They annoy the shit out of
me. And shooting mini-baby potatoes at them makes me
feel better, okay?

TANYA
Yeah, that makes perfect sense...
(pause)
Are you writing a book?

JERRY
Nope.

TANYA
A play? Music?

JERRY
Nope. I’m a journalist.

TANYA
What kind?

JERRY
Just a staff writer. My editor gives me writing
assignments. I usually cover events, things like that.

TANYA
Where does the writer’s block come from if you cover
events? That shouldn’t be too hard to write about.

JERRY
It’s just..Stressful, okay?

TANYA
I can see that. Seeing how your shooting--

~~JERRY shoots another "seagull".

TANYA
Give me that!

~~She grabs the potato gun from him.

JERRY
Will you give that back please?

TANYA
Nope. I’m going to give it a try.

JERRY
Please? I’d really like my potato gun back.

TANYA
Not until you tell me what the big deal is.

JERRY
Why do you care?

TANYA
Because, no one should be stressed about what they do.
I mean, there should be a level of stress, but not so
much stress they lose their minds and go off shooting
seagulls.

JERRY
(sighs)
Fine. The last article I wrote was a review for a local
theater company’s production of The Phantom of the
Opera.

TANYA
Oh.

JERRY
It wasn’t the nicest review I ever wrote, but that’s my
job. To report on the truth. The paper posted it online
and there was an outcry from the theater community.

TANYA
What do you mean?

JERRY
Actors, directors, dancers, costume designers, you name
it - lashed out at me and criticized my reporting. Now,
whenever I sit down to write a article I think about
how people will react.

TANYA
What kind of stuff did they say?

JERRY
"You don’t know what real art is", "That was just a bad
night - you should have given us the benefit of the
doubt"...

TANYA
That’s not so bad...

JERRY
But the one that really got me, was from this dancer.
She said "You’re just a washed up hack who will take
out your unsuccessful career. And wh--"

TANYA
"And when you die I’ll dance, ’poorly’, on your grave."
(pause.)
Sorry.

JERRY
That was you?

TANYA
Too be fair, I was a little intoxicated...

JERRY
But-

TANYA
And, the other dancers put me up to it...

JERRY
How you say such-

TANYA
BUT, too be perfectly honest, I agreed with most - if
not all - of what you said.

JERRY
You did?

TANYA
Look. You’re a journalist. You report the truth. And
the truth is, that production was awful. It’s not your
fault if people can’t handle that.

JERRY
I guess.

TANYA
Plus, they shouldn’t let what "one guy" says about
their production effect them. They should go on stage
every night and do their best.

JERRY
You’re right.

TANYA
And you know what? If people have enough time to sit at
their computers and be angry at someone doing their
job, then why aren’t they out doing their’s? Instead of
coming up with hateful things to say, rehearse and get
better.

JERRY
Is that what you did?

TANYA
Not really. I didn’t like being involved in that show.

JERRY
What are you out here for anyway.

TANYA
Walking. Taking pictures. It’s my way of relaxing. It’s
my--

JERRY
--own version of "Feeding" The Seagulls.

TANYA
Something like that.


CURTAIN